If I Were a Boy

Linking up with Erin over at http://www.livinginyellow.com :)

If I were a boy....

....I wouldn't have had to worry about pulling my hair into a pony this morning because I didn't feel like doing it.  Running a brush, or more likely, my hand through it would have done the trick.

....the khakis and school tee I pulled on for hump day wouldn't have been a cop out or a comfy treat but my normal uniform.

....while running on the treadmill last night controlling my boobs in a variety of bras to prevent my being knocked unconscious would not even be an issue.

....I would not have the compulsion to eat anything chocolate that is not nailed down.

....Hallmark and Sarah MacLachlan sad puppy commercials would not reduce me to tears.

....I could sew wild oats and date around and act a fool and no one would call me a floozy or a tease or a hot mess. I'd just be "being a guy". 

....comfort over fashion could always, always be my motto.

....dressing up would still consists of pants and a shirt.  I'll whine about the tie but it won't even come close to matching the horror or pantyhose, Spanx and heels. 

....I'll be able to simply stop drinking REGULAR Coke to lose those pesky 10 pounds I picked up over the holidays.  Within a week they'll be gone.

In short, I will live a charmed life.  But sadly I will never, ever understand women.  It's okay though.  They don't understand us either.